Questions from Anna

Anna is my inquisitive child... she likes to ask questions all the time. Lately she's been asking questions about my jewelry... Today it was about my wedding rings that I am still wearing. She wanted to know where I got them... I told her that Daddy gave them to me. She then asked about my heart necklace (a locket with the word Mom on it) and I told her that she and Lily gave me that. Then she asked about my necklace with the letter C on it and the big circle (Lee's wedding ring). I told her that Daddy gave me the necklace and that when he died that I asked for his ring. That seemed to satisfy her for today.

I've been thinking about my jewlery quite a bit myself lately.. I'd been considering taking off my wedding rings (not that I no longer love Lee or that I'm ready to date at all) but then the other day Anna noticed that I didn't have them on yet (i take them off at night mostly since I'm afraid of scratching myself with them).. so she asked and I went and got them from the spot that i put them each night. She helped me put them on and then gave me a big smile and said to me... Now you're Mommy again. It made me smile. That very simple little sentence made me realize that for now I can't really take the rings off yet. That to her they are part of me. That I wear rings that Daddy gave me a long time ago makes me her mom in her mind. It might be even less simple than that for her but for now I'm happy to wear them. I actually don't want to take them off.. it makes things easier. They are such a part of me that I actually feel weird not having them on. It's like a part of Lee is still with me somehow.